Do a Google search of a Bible verse for marriage. You won’t find this verse listed. And yet it could be the most important one of all. At least that’s what I’m finding as I continue to strive and struggle to be the husband my wife needs me to be.
I’m to love her like Christ loves the Church. That’s in your Google search. But how in the WORLD do I do that? That’s a lofty goal. My goodness. Like Christ loves the Church? He left glory to come to this earth to seek and to save the Church (all of us lost people who have come to Him). I can’t do that. I can’t even come close. But husbands are called to it.
An Unlikely Bible Verse For Marriage
Maybe I’m called to love her like this because God knows I can’t and it’s another area in my life that I have to solely depend on His grace and His Spirit to enable and empower me to do so. I think that’s right.
I fail. All. The. Time. At this. I wish I could tell you that I’ve grown in my marriage with my wife as much as I’ve grown in my understanding of Theology. I wish I could tell you that. But I would be lying.
Want to know how much you’ve really changed, how much you’ve allowed God’s Spirit to mold you? Look at how you treat your spouse. I have a long way to go. I could be more loving. I could be more kind. I could be more compassionate.
The Bible Verse I’m Trying to Live Out By God’s Grace
By God’s grace. By God’s Spirit. This is the unlikely Bible verse for marriage that I so need to live out:
“If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.” – Luke 9:23
Jesus is saying this statement so that everyone would know that following Him meant they would elevate His will above their own. It meant that following Him would result in cross carrying. That meant they would be walking to the death of their will every single day. It also kept open the possibility that they could literally walk to their death for His sake.
Jesus goes on to say that this is the key to finding one’s life. What’s the key? The denial of self.
A Good Marriage Looks A Lot Like Following Jesus
I believe that the days I actually do deny myself (in all areas of my life, even my marriage), are the best days in my relationship with Sara. She feels the most loved when I follow Jesus in my marriage. Of course! Could it be that simple? I think so. Is it easy? Ha. No!
I know all this theologically. I know all this when I reflect on my failures as a husband. But I must move this knowledge to action. And while I’m doing so, I must depend solely on God’s power working in and through me. I can’t do it by my own willpower. I’ve tried. It doesn’t work. I’m not that good.
Marriage: Making You Holy
A friend of mine and elder at The Crossing, Gary Pringle has said this statement many times (and he got it from Gary Thomas): “I believe God’s goal in marriage isn’t to make us happy, but to make us holy.”
That’s wisdom! It’s true. Sure. Of course, happiness is cool. But holiness is much better! You may be thinking, holiness doesn’t sound too sexy, and I agree. But then again, when I follow Jesus in my marriage, it’s almost like I’m bringing sexy back (see what I did there?). I bet Justin Timberlake didn’t think that would happen with his lyrics![shareable]’I believe God’s goal in marriage isn’t to make us happy, but to make us holy.'[/shareable]
My Own Challenge and My Challenge For All Husbands
Today and every day hereafter, my challenge is this: deny the self and love my wife.
The self wants her to serve me. I must deny it and serve her.
Will you join in on the challenge? Let me know in the comments below or on social media (Facebook | Twitter).
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